When it comes to failing at marriage, most husbands and I have both previously been there done that. In the beginning of most relationship, hours of times is spent talking with each other about our ex spouses; the good, the bad, and the downright ugly. We longed to know every detail about each other’s past because we knew we were falling in love and we had a strong desire to do everything right this time.
Oddly (or perhaps not so strange at all) the main reason we both felt our previous marriages failed was because we didn’t feel appreciated. Admittedly, we had both fallen short in showing appreciation too.
I’m so grateful for the open communication we shared early on because I believe it helped us enter into marriage on the right foot, while also strengthening us for the difficult times we’ve endured along the way.
As it turns out, showing appreciation towards each other is not really all that mind numbing. It’s actually quite rewarding!
Here are 6 simple ways to bless your spouse {and your marriage/love relationship} with a healthy dose of appreciation:
1. A simple Thank You goes a long way. Be aware of opportunities to thank your spouse for the efforts they make in creating a wonderful life with you. If you’re a stay at home mom, thank your husband for going to work every day so you can stay home with the kids. Not everyone can afford such a luxury. Guys, did your wife work her way out to clean the house and prepare your favorite meal today? Thank her for her loving actions.
2. Speak proudly of your spouse to others. This is one of those great opportunities to lift your lover’s confidence by shouting your admiration to the world. Make sure he/she is within earshot first, or your words will have less impact. Something like, “After months of working long hours and being totally stressed out, Danney got a promotion at work today! I’m so proud of him!” is a great example of proudly speaking words of appreciation.
3. Submit to each other. . This sign of appreciation truly is the key to a loving, happy marriage.Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife… ~Ephesians 5:22 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her… ~Ephesians 5:25 Often misunderstood, the whole biblical issue of submitting to your spouse simply means for wives to love and respect their husbands as the leader or head of the home and husbands are to love their wives abundantly, putting her well being above all other things Connect intimately.
You may not realize it, but making love is a symbol of appreciation. It’s also a huge factor in keeping the spark alive in your marriage. Spending one-on-one time together is vital. If you do nothing else on this list, make sure you are giving yourself intimately to your spouse. Initiate time together. It’s not always sexual intimacy either. Truly connecting means loving your spouse both physically and emotionally.
4. Smile. Body language speaks volumes. You may be completely engrossed in cooking breakfast, but if your spouse approaches you only to find a scowl on your face, that will no doubt send the message that you’re irritated or upset with them. Whenever you come face to face with your spouse, look them in the eye and smile. It’s so simple and can really change the mood of a conversation, literally pouring new life into your marriage/ relationship.
5. Listen intently; show an interest in what he/she says. When we show zero interest in what our spouse has to say, we are essentially telling them we don’t value them as a person. My spouse loves to talk about the latest technology and politics. If you don’t know anything about what your spouse is talking about, make it a point to ask lots of questions and get interested in it. Let them know you care about what they care about. You would want them to do the same for you. Showing love and appreciation happens in a multitude of ways.
By Sheila A. Williams
QUOTE FOR THE DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Always put yourself in others’ shoes.
If you feel that it hurts you,
it probably hurts the other person, too.
